Pastor Jeff shared these points alongside last weekend's message. We have reposted them here for those who wish to revisit this information:
1) Am I speaking in love? Corollary: Is the person sharing with me speaking in love?
2) Would I say this if the other person was present to hear it? Corollary: Would I be hearing this if the other person was a party to this conversation?
3) Have I said this to the other person, firsthand? Corollary: Has this been said to the other person, face to face, before it has been shared with me?
4) Would I feel comfortable if I were in the other person’s place and this was being said about me? Corollary: Would I be comfortable if I were the other person and someone was hearing this about me?
5) Am I serving as a talebearer, a gossip or a busybody as I share this information? Corollary: Am I helping someone serve as a talebearer, a gossip or a busybody by hearing this information?
6) Why do I want to share this information? Corollary: What seems to be the motive behind their desire to share the information with me or my desire to hear it?
7) Is this information gracious and will it prove to be edifying to the hearer, myself, or the one we are talking about? Is it something they need to know? Corollary: Is this information gracious and will it edify me, the one sharing, or the one we are talking about?
8) Will sharing this information put the hearer in the biblical position of needing to bring the matter into the light while constraining them to keep the secret in the darkness? Corollary: Will hearing this information put me in the position of needing to bring the matter into the light while binding me to secrecy that leaves it in the darkness?
9) Is my sharing this a rightful part of the procedure for reconciliation described in Matthew 5:23-4 or Matthew 18:15-17? Corollary: Is my hearing this a rightful part of the procedures for reconciliation prescribed in these Matthew passages?